Author: Jon Hoferle

City Renter University: The Best Fictional Choice in Renter Education (Part II)

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Imagine there's a fictional university dedicated to renter education located right here in Chicago. Its name is City Renter University. Within this university, there are many different departments, professors, and courses.

In January, I shared a list of fictional course descriptions offered by the Department of Apartment Hunting (DAH).

Of course, not every student wants to focus on apartment hunting. Some have their eyes on the bigger picture, and know that once you find the apartment you have to actually move into it. Good for them!

For these students (and for all of you out there), I'd like to introduce another department in this college: The Department of Moving and Disagreement (MAD). Their course offerings on the City Renter University website might look something like this:

The Department of Moving and Disagreement

With great history and tradition, The Department of Moving and Disagreement (MAD) welcomes our students. Our program features one of the smallest student-to-furniture ratios in the country. The many opportunities to interact face-to-sweaty-face with our outstanding faculty allows our students to grow as movers and sharpen their skills at arguing about “the best way to get it around that corner.” Below you will find courses offered for First Term 2016.

MAD 102 – Foundations of the Moving Lexicon

This introduction to the language of moving allows students to develop, disseminate, and integrate the concepts of the diverse dialects, speech communities, and guttural sounds of the moving process. Students will learn the cultural contexts in which yelling “Turn it TOWARDS me” actually means “Turn it AWAY from me.”

MAD 105 – Digital Liberty and Setting Things Down

An examination of the conflict between fingers, toes, and the state power of heavy objects that seek to crush and imprison them. In MAD 105, students will analyze the compelling ethical questions behind the individual's surrender to the force of weight and the conditions and circumstances under which not dropping an object may qualify as torture.

MAD 204 – Motivation, Paint Fumes, and the Brain

This course focuses on the analysis of motivated behaviors (e.g. putting that chair in the corner) and the neural and cognitive processes that influence such behavior in a freshly painted apartment. Some field work is necessary. Field discussions may include lack of inhibition, brief mild euphoria, and increased hostility due to headache.

MAD 217 – The Unwilling Helper: Studies in Persuasion

Students will explore the best means to persuade an unwilling individual to participate in the moving process, paying special attention to bribery, shaming, and coercion. Course activities will include critiques of presentation techniques and the study of body language to determine the likely validity or falsity of excuses.

MAD 335 – Patterns and Cultural Identity in Box Labeling

This course reflects upon the consequences of faster and clearer labels on moving society, with an emphasis on the political and economic migration of those boxes marked with contents and destination rooms. Course participants will be required to make and wear their own "content" and "destination" labels for the duration of the term. Students labeled "fragile" may be dropped.

MAD 370 – Not Heavy but Awkward: Dance in Moving Society

Students will research the effect of improvisational and experimental movement as art, exploring themes such as originality, authenticity, and the methods through which different moving societies negotiate the cruelty of narrow stairways.

MAD 398 – Professional Moving Field Experience (12 weeks)

CRU lifting straps are available in the University Bookstore.

Do you know someone who would make a great student at CRU? How about potential instructors? Do you have an idea for a great course of study at CRU? Share it with us in the comments!

RentConfident is a Chicago startup that provides renters with the in-depth information they need to choose safe apartments. Help us reach more renters! Like, Share and Retweet us!

Published by

Jon Hoferle

Life… in an Apartment (as narrated in the style of Sir David Attenborough) A Nature documentary.

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Editor's Note: This article is written in the style of Sir David Attenborough, a well-known narrator of nature documentaries for the BBC. If you are not familiar with his enormous body of work, you can find some examples on Youtube.

Inside this enchanted multifamily building, life is swirling in a spectacular dance. Despite its calm brick exterior, this building is home to an exciting collection of animals. Between the walls, insects teem, feasting on glue and grease. Majestic birds, descendants of small feathered dinosaurs, make their homes in its eaves. Thousands of miles from the African plains, a feline predator waits for mice or daybreak.

This is a place of wonders. The Chicago Apartment.

Life here has been called nature's secret – for in these rooms, life has evolved to thrive behind locked doors.

Join me... as I explore the world of the extraordinary creatures of the Apartment. Continue reading Life… in an Apartment (as narrated in the style of Sir David Attenborough) A Nature documentary.

Published by

Jon Hoferle

Don’t Love Thy Neighbor Part III: 11 more bizarre neighbor complaints as told to a former property manager

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A long time ago, in a kingdom not so far far away, I worked in the customer service department of an apartment management company. One of the lessons I quickly learned is that if you put a bunch of different people in the same building, some of them are going to have problems with their neighbors. I fielded a lot of neighbor complaints. Most of them were fairly standard: loud music in the middle of the night, leaving full trash bags on the porches, and the ever-popular Walking Too Loudly.

Every once in a while though, I'd get a truly bizarre complaint. I kept a file of these in my mind.

You can read the first two collections here: Don't Love Thy Neighbor and Don't Love Thy Neighbor Part II.

If you enjoyed those (or even if you didn't), go ahead and read this brand new list of how people fail to co-exist -- even more of the strangest tenant complaints that I ever received as a property manager.

  1. When I'm eating, my upstairs neighbor does jumping exercises and things fall from the ceiling into my food.
  2. Yesterday the guy who lives down the hall was standing in his apartment doorway hissing like a snake at people. Today he's saying he's a vampire on a broomstick.
  3. Almost every day a large group of people comes to visit my neighbor across the hall. They ring my buzzer. If I don't answer, they ring all the buzzers. Sometimes they kick my door. They pound on my neighbor's door and yell his name. The weird thing is I haven't seen my neighbor in weeks.
  4. The sound of weights being dropped on my ceiling occurs many times a day. My parakeet does not like it, nor do I.
  5. My downstairs neighbor is freestyle rapping. (complaint on voicemail, no address given)
  6. Someone is collecting boxes of scrap metal and storing them right in the middle of the laundry room. There are literally sharp pieces of metal sticking out of them, right where people pass by. And I can tell you who it is – they labeled the boxes with their name and apartment number.
  7. There are petrified chunks of dog poop in the front yard of the house next door. Can you let whoever owns that house know that they might want to clean up their front yard and tell their teenager to pick up after the dog?
  8. My upstairs neighbor has left me several notes that she can hear my phone ring and “it disturbs her.” My ringtone is just a normal telephone sound. I don't know what to do.
  9. Someone in the building cooks fish every day, and it stinks up the hallway. I think it may be the woman in 1B who sings opera badly. Maybe you could post a note about both?
  10. My bath mat got stolen from the laundry room last month. Today I found it in the elevator. It was wet.
  11. Whenever anyone enters the building the small dog in the downstairs apartment starts barking. Sometimes this causes the dog in the upstairs apartment to start barking. This causes the large dog that lives with the small dog to start barking. This causes the upstairs dog to bark more, and the small dog is still barking. They all bark for at least fifteen minutes, and that's if they start roughly at the same time. And that's on a good day! It's a madhouse of noise! I have knocked on the downstairs tenants' door and nicely requested that they stop their dogs from barking. They said that they are currently working on this issue.

If you have any neighbor complaints to share, I'd love if you told me about them. Strange neighbors make for the best stories! I'm thinking about doing a reader-sourced version for next installment of neighbor complaints. Post a comment if you've got any to share with us!

RentConfident is a Chicago startup that provides renters with the in-depth information they need to choose safe apartments. Help us reach more renters! Like, Share and Retweet us!

Published by

Jon Hoferle

Should You let Your Roommate’s Partner Move in? This Hilarious Diagram Will Help You Find Out!

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So it was Valentine's Day last weekend. And your roommate has now come to you with a request. They want to move in together! Isn't that special? But here's the catch: they want to move in together right here. In your apartment.

Of course, they both agreed that they would only do it if you were cool with it.

Are you cool with it? Here's a handy diagram to help you figure it out!

Too small? Click here to see the full size version!

Roommate moving in - decision tree

Published by

Jon Hoferle

City to City: Apartment life and laws in 10 different US cities

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Here in the US we celebrate the birthdays of two different major Presidents from our history, but different states observe them on different dates. Here in Illinois, along with Connecticut, New York and Missouri, we observe Abraham Lincoln's birthday on February 12. Indiana observes his birthday on the day after Thanksgiving. The rest of the country lumps Lincoln together with George Washington, celebrating their birthdays together on the nationwide holiday we call "Presidents Day," the third Monday in February.

Regional differences also show up in apartment life. Today we wanted to give you a quick comparison of the various quirks and major laws that affect apartment hunting in the 10 largest, most apartment-filled cities in the United States. Sources are linked as needed. Some definitions of the information provided here, along with my research methods, are included at the bottom of the post.

Information is current as of February 2016 to the best of my knowledge, but it is subject to change.

Boston, MA

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $1600 - 4800, Median $2400.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $1537
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 35% of all housing.
Renting Population: 65% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: No
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Tenants
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: One Month's Rent. (Note: under Massachusetts law, a landlord cannot collect any additional fees or deposits such as pet fees, key fees, etc.) [Source]
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Natural gas, Electricity, Heating oil
Recycling & Composting: Landlord must buy recycling bins from the city for all buildings with 7 or more units. [Source (PDF)]
Landlord Notice of Entry: Landlord must give notice, but no specific time period is specified.
Special Protected Classes: Age, Sexual orientation, Military history, Single parents, Unmarried parents, Source of income, Source of rent.
Don't Assume That... You'll be able to find an apartment for any date other than September 1. Nearly 80% of Boston's apartments turn over between September 1 and September 14 each year. [Source]

Chicago, IL

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $850 - 7100, Median $1995.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $1176
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 30% of all housing.
Renting Population: 55% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: No
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Landlords
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: No restrictions.
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Natural gas, Electricity
Recycling & Composting: Landlord must provide an "effective plan" to separate at least 3 types of recyclable materials from other trash. [Source]
Landlord Notice of Entry: 2 days for most buildings [Source].
Special Protected Classes: Ancestry, sexual orientation, marital status, parental status, military discharge status, source of income, source of rent.
Don't Assume That... You will need to provide a refundable security deposit. Due to quirks in Chicago rental laws, many landlords now charge non-refundable "move in fees" instead of deposits.

Dallas, TX

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $940 - 3498, Median $1583.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $780 - 1440 depending on Zip Code.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 41% of housing.
Renting Population: 57% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: No
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Landlords
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: No restrictions.
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Electricity, Natural gas
Recycling & Composting: Landlords are not required to provide recycling.
Landlord Notice of Entry: Landlord must give notice, but no time period is specified. [Source]
Special Protected Classes: Sexual orientation.
Don't Assume That... Your building will have a basement. Dallas has what is called "expansive clay" soil, which means underground portions of buildings get squeezed and shifted around.

Denver, CO

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $835 - 5700, Median $1687.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $1227.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 33% of housing.
Renting Population: 50% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: No
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Landlords
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: No restrictions.
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Natural gas, electricity.
Recycling & Composting: City recycling does not cover buildings with 8 or more units. The landlord is not required to provide recycling. [Source]
Landlord Notice of Entry: No laws.
Special Protected Classes: Creed, Sexual orientation, Marital Status, Ancestry
Don't Assume That... You will be allowed to consume marijuana in your apartment. Landlords can currently set their own rules in the lease that override the state laws.

Houston, TX

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $420 - 6222, Median $1735.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $948.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 41% of housing.
Renting Population: 55% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: No
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Landlords
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: No restrictions.
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Electricity, Natural Gas
Recycling & Composting: City recycling does not cover buildings with 9 or more units. Landlord is not required to provide recycling. [Source]
Landlord Notice of Entry: Landlord must give notice, but no time period is specified. [Source]
Special Protected Classes: Ethnicity, Age, Marital status, Military status, Sexual orientation, Genetic information, Gender identity, Pregnancy.
Don't Assume That... Your apartment will be surrounded by other residential buildings. Houston is known for its lack of usage-specific zoning, which means your building could be surrounded by shops, restaurants or factories.

Los Angeles, CA

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $1025 - 27100, Median $2193.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $1490.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 41% of housing.
Renting Population: 63% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: Yes. [Source]
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Landlords
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: 2 months rent for unfurnished apartments, 3 months rent for furnished apartments. [Source]
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Natural gas, Electricity
Recycling & Composting: Landlords are required to provide recycling. [Source]
Landlord Notice of Entry: 24 hours. [Source]
Special Protected Classes: Sexual orientation, Gender identity, Gender expression, Marital status, Medical condition, Ancestry, Source of Income, Age, Genetic information, Arbitrary discrimination.
Don't Assume That... Your apartment will come with a refrigerator. LA is a "bring your own appliances" kind of town.

New York, NY (All 5 Boroughs)

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $645 - 12000, Median $2425.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $1571.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 51% of housing.
Renting Population: 68% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: Yes. [Source]
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Tenants
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: No maximum except for rent-controlled units, then generally 1 month. [Source (PDF)]
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Natural gas, heating oil, Electricity
Recycling & Composting: Landlord must notify tenants about recycling requirements and provide a recycling area. [Source (PDF)]
Landlord Notice of Entry: "Reasonable" notice. [Source (PDF)]
Special Protected Classes: Creed, Age, Alienage or Citizenship Status, Gender identity, Sexual orientation, Marital status, Lawful Occupation, Military status, Source of Income, Source of rent, Partnership status, Retaliation.
Don't Assume That... Your bedroom will have a window, nor that your bathroom will have a shower.

San Francisco, CA

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $1200 - 15500, Median $4495.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $2289.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 40% of housing.
Renting Population: 63% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: Yes. [Source]
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Tenants
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: 2 months rent for unfurnished apartments, 3 months rent for furnished apartments. [Source]
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Natural gas, Electricity
Recycling & Composting: Landlord must provide both recycling and composting. [Source]
Landlord Notice of Entry: 24 hours. [Source]
Special Protected Classes: Ancestry, Place of birth, Age, Creed, Sexual orientation, Gender identity, Source of income, Weight, Height.
Don't Assume That... You will be able to just move in with any roommate. Prepare for interviews. Bring a resume.

Seattle, WA

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $950 - 6802, Median $1939.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $1523.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 38% of housing.
Renting Population: 54% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: No.
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Tenants
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: No maximum.
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Electricity, natural gas.
Recycling & Composting: City recycling and compost bins are available for landlords. Landlords may be fined if their garbage dumpsters contain more than 10% recyclable material. [Source]
Landlord Notice of Entry: 24 hours for showings, otherwise 48 hours. [Source]
Special Protected Classes: Creed, Marital status, Sexual orientation, Gender identity, Military/veteran status, Age, Political ideology, Use of a trained guide dog, Source of Rent.
Don't Assume That... Water, Sewage and Trash pickup service are included in the rent. Many landlords will bill you separately for these public utilities.

Washington, DC

Rent, 2 bedroom:  $840 - 7230, Median $2580.
Fair Market Rent, 2 bedroom: $1623.
Apartment Stock: Apartments make up 42% of housing.
Renting Population: 58% of housing is occupied by renters.
Rent Control: No.
Who Normally Pays Rental Agents: Landlord
Maximum Security Deposit Allowed: One month rent [Source]
Predominant Heating Fuels Used: Natural gas.
Recycling & Composting: Landlord required to provide recycling for buildings with 4 or more units. [Source]
Landlord Notice of Entry: No law.
Special Protected Classes: Age, Personal appearance, Sexual orientation, Gender identity/expression, Family responsibilities, Political affiliation, Matriculation, Familial status, Genetic information, Source of income, Place of residence/business, Victims of domestic violence/stalking/sexual assault.
Don't Assume That... You'll be able to live alone. Roommates and "group housing" are the standard arrangement in DC.

Glossary and Research Methodology

Rent rates are calculated based on the 100 most recent 2 bedroom apartments posted to Craigslist in each city as of February 11, 2016 at about 10pm Central Time.

The Fair Market Rent Rate (FMR) is set by the US Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) each year, and is used to set the amounts that government entities will offer for subsidized apartments across the country. You can search for the current FMRs for all apartment sizes near you here.

Rent Control, also known as Rent Regulation, is government-controlled limitations on how high rent can be raised in an apartment when a lease expires.

Apartment Stock, Renting Population and Heating Fuel data are all sourced from the 2014 American Community Survey 5 year estimates as provided by the US Census Bureau.

Federal law protects the following classes of citizens from a fair housing perspective nationwide: Race, color, religion, sex, disability, familial status, national origin. The City by City lists above mention only protected classes specified by local laws in addition to these seven groups.

Published by

Jon Hoferle