Author: Jon Hoferle

The following is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people or events is purely coincidental and unintentional, and hopefully amusing.

Apples and Pears Property Management is a hardworking, mid-sized budget property management service with buildings all over the north side of Chicago. We're grateful that they've chosen to occasionally share their phone logs with us so we can see what life is like on the receiving end of maintenance requests from hundreds of renters!

December has brought some joyful noise to the Apples and Pears Portfolio. Let's see how their tenants are coping with holiday fever!

Want more adventures from Apples and Pears, and their hardworking crew of Martin, Olly and Pete? You can read Part I here.

Continue reading Apples & Pears Property Management Phone Log Part II, Thursday December 17, 2015

A handwritten note slipped under your neighbor's door explaining that you're having a holiday party and to “feel free to stop by” is not an invitation. Use only invitations that come in small envelopes, are printed on cardstock, and are delivered at least two weeks before the event.

If you need to make several trips to bring in bags of food from the grocery store, do not prop the front door open. This can cause a draft. Always use the back stairs for this. Continue reading 15 Tips for Preparing and Hosting a Holiday Party from Your Uptight Downstairs Neighbor

Happy Black Friday! If you're reading this from your phone in a checkout line, congratulations on your bravery and tolerance. If you're reading this while relaxing in your pajamas at home, congratulations on helping make the world a more tranquil place.

Today I would like to talk about good gifts for apartment dwellers. Of course the best gift for any Chicago apartment resident is a RentConfident gift certificate. However, I know that a lot of renters don't live in Chicago, so until we can expand to other cities, here are some other suggestions.

When I shop for one of these gifts, I follow two rules. 1) I try to make sure that it's either beautiful or useful. 2) Because this person may not share my ideas on beauty and usefulness, I try to make sure that it's not too big – maybe less than one quarter of the volume of those medium-sized plastic storage tubs. That way I know that it's not taking up too much space in the back of their closet.

I've spent the last few days browsing online shops and Apartment Gift Top Ten Lists and jotted down some items that caught my eye.  Mostly they are things that I have and enjoy having or things that I'd like to have. So yes, I did create a gift list for me, and I am calling it a list for everyone who lives in an apartment. That's just how I shop. Are you ready to see what I've found? Continue reading 10 great gifts for your apartment dwelling friends (or apartment dwelling self)

Since it's coming up on Thanksgiving, I'd like to talk a little bit about cooking a turkey. Many of us only cook a turkey once a year or once every few years. It's one of those things that we do so infrequently that we forget how to do it properly. If we don't take the time to refresh ourselves, it can turn into a stressful near disaster. It's the same thing with apartment hunting. So I've made this little chart that explains how turkey cooking can be like apartment hunting. I hope you like it.

Continue reading The Corresponding Pitfalls of Turkeys and Apartments